lobsterchick's Diaryland Diary

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Parenting Tip #2

When coming up with baby names, yell each contender as loud as you can, as follows:

"JACKSON, WHERE ARE YOU?"

"PAIGE, GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!"

"NO, ALESSANDRA, I'M NOT BUYING YOU THE THREE IN ONE CARE BEAR BOARD GAME SET IN COLLECTORS TIN!"

"GABE, PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON!"

"DID YOU SWALLOW THAT BOOGER, TAYLOR?"

"GIVE MOMMY THE LIGHTER, DUDLEY!"

Etc., etc. Because otherwise, you might end up like a woman I heard in Kohl's today, shouting "Sage! Sage! SAAAAGE!" Clearly it had never occurred to her that one day she'd be shouting her child's name in a store, and that Sage is a really moronic name.

2:49 PM - 11 October 2003

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