lobsterchick's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10.Suck This may be the best TV earthquake movie ever! Even better than 1990's The Big One starring Joanna Kerns! It has way worse dialogue, choppier "edgy" camera work, and a really bad model train overhead shot. Seriously, there are some good actors in here, like Kim Delaney and Dul� Hill, but oh God, is the dialogue gloriously bad. I would pay good money to own this script, especially the part where President Beau Bridges slams down his basketball and runs out like a little girl when he finds out there's been an earthquake. Is this the man whose hand we want on the button? And dude, fuck the German ambassador, the president is concerned with "our people." God bless America, man! God bless America! I like the always omniscient Guys With Computers, yelling back and forth at each other, "6.1!" "6.2!" Because it's not like they're staring at the exact same information on their screens or anything. Oi. I'm only about a half hour in, but so far my favorite part is after the model train falls into the ground (The crack appears to be chasing the train, and once it swallows it, stops expanding. As if the earth is now full, and needs to eat no more.), and a little tumbleweed follows it in. What a priceless little addition. And for real dude, how much do you have to love it when a Duke of Hazzard is in a TV movie? You have to love it a lot, that's how much. Dude, I wish the current California governor was as self-possessed and in-control as the one in this movie. Listen to this gem: "We're gonna get through this. Let's just take it step by step, okay?" And everyone in the scene nods, relieved that she is there to deliver this tidbit. Fucking awesome. Dude, I am in love with the helicopter reporter who sees the Golden Gate Bridge fall apart. Here's how he says his lines: "It looks like the entire brige. (pause) Is going to fall. (pause) Into the bay." Like, no emotion at all. And it's totally great the way he is almost counting those beats out loud. Okay, I just finished watching Part One. Even with all the horrible things about this miniseries, I think my favorite so far is the fact that it sounds like it was written by someone from Pluto who heard about the way humans talk from his cousin, who knew someone whose grandma once read an Earth romance novel. Best line so far? "Return the car! And that's final!" *Click* Awesome. 11:57 PM - 02 May 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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