lobsterchick's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Depresso, the Worst Super Hero EVER! Gah. I'm totally depressed right now. For one thing, I haven't been able to take my antidepressant for almost a week now, since the way I get them is not strictly legal, so I had to tell my doctor that I'm not taking them anymore. I'm afraid to touch them until I can go off the vicodin, which I thought I had a shot at today. Not so. I didn't get to sleep until 5:30 last night (oi!), so when I woke up at 1:30, I tried not to beat myself up too hard. It was only eight hours, after all. I never thought I'd be a person who would listen actively to a "Sounds of the Ocean" CD, but here I am. The headaches have taken me down all sorts of paths I never dreamed I'd take. Anywho, I didn't have to take the Vicodin until 7:30, and when I did, it just totally knocked me on my ass, and I had to take another one at 10:30. We only had one show at work this week, and I had to call in. I was in the middle of putting my shoes on Friday night and suddenly I was just completely bushed. I just... couldn't do it. On Wednesday, one of the places I applied to work for (an auto shop) called and told me to come in any time and fill out an application. After having such a hard time with getting the meds that day I was thrilled to have good news, and assured the woman that I'd be in sometime during the week. Which I couldn't handle. I can't tell if it's fatigue from the vicodin, or the lethargy that invades every part of my body when I'm not riding high on the Anti-Depressant Express, but I've finally thrown in the towel. I'm seeing a chiropractor Monday like my mother suggested. When she said it, it made as much sense to me as going to a faith healer who specializes in finger injuries. Though I believe in chiropractors, it didn't seem to correlate with what was happening to me. At this point, though, I'm all, "Bring on Finger Joe and the Chiropractor!" (which would make a great name for a band). Fuck the pain. Fuck the tiredness. Fuck the drugs. I just need someone to fix me. And find me a job. And an apartment. And I don't know, whatever else they're giving away free... 2:49 AM - 29 February 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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